Relationships are key to people's lives. As John Donne said so late in the late 1500: "Nobody is an island." These words continue true today. Until now, most people have not learned how to make relationships and feel well within them. Relationships are challenging because they involve two different individuals with different needs, desires and opinions. When the needs and wishes of the individual do not match, there are usually differences, disappointments and dissatisfaction. It is in these times that we ask our relationships and wonder if we would be better alone. What can you do to create a more enjoyable relationship?
With conscious intent and effort, we can use our relationships to cure and change our lives. This new approach, or model for relationships, consists of three steps: 1) taking responsibility for our actions and responses; 2) experience our deep feelings; and 3) express ourselves and honestly to our partners while equally sympathetic to the feelings of our partners. As we learn to do this, our relationships can gain deeper understanding and become a vehicle for our personal growth and accomplishment.
The first step in the new concept, which takes responsibility for our actions and responses, can be ignorant and sometimes awesome experience. It involves examining how we are promoting or creating disturbing circumstances, instead of automatically teaching our partner about the misunderstanding. When we can release our defense and receive responsibility, both sides encourage the courier and the door to open honestly. For many, there is a risk of taking responsibility for their actions and responses to the most difficult part of communicating. Men can feel that they lose energy or abolish their throne. Women may feel as if they give in or be sick and submissive. In either case, it usually feels like some kind of loss, either of personal energy or part of ourselves. Although difficult at first, this step can lead to a much greater understanding of the response of our behavioral patterns and can significantly increase our personal growth.
The second step in this model is to experience our deep feelings. This step involves removing ourselves from the immediate state and taking a deep breath to contemplate what is happening inside us. We may become aware of certain physical feelings such as tightness in the throat, chest or stomach. Feelings like grief, injuries or anger may surface. Thoughts or memories can come to our knowledge. Learning to concentrate will take an exercise because many of us have spent very little time focusing on ourselves and how we actually find. As with all the steps of this new ideology, we must be patient with ourselves and thank every little step we take.
Knowledge can also be difficult because our current feelings are often influenced by what has happened in the past. For example, if we have contacted in the past who would feel criticized or untrue, the odds are good that our new relationship will also lead to these emotions. Love tends to come to the surface that all pain needs to heal. This is one reason why the new concept of relationships is so powerful. Instead of repeating old ways to be blind, we can use our relationships to work on ourselves – to notice the ideas and behaviors we constantly revive and begin to explore them within the Union's security. The key is to take time to remove ourselves from the situation and find what's actually happening inside. This gives us time to slowly reflect so that we can act instead of responding.
The third step in this new model describes us automatically and honestly with our partner while you have the same sympathy or gratitude for the feelings of our members. This step involves telling our partners the truth about how we feel. It's important to avoid the tendency to revert to old patterns that are related to making our partners wrong, going depression, playing a play based on old pain or entering a miracle. To communicate clearly, we need to go beyond teaching and judging the truth about our experiences. We need to make a decision to be happy in our relationship is more important than being right. The only way to do this is to be completely honest with ourselves and our partners.
Even important in this third step is to feel sorry for the feelings of our company. This means that our affiliate can express how they feel and make an honest attempt to understand them. In other words, we need to put ourselves in place and experience what they feel. This type of exchange is the beginning of genuine communication and the birth of a totally new relationship. Both parties will begin to feel power and love. As a couple reaches a deeper sense and sense, their strength strengthens in all areas of their lives.
Practicing the three steps in the new concept – taking responsibility for our actions and responses, experimenting deeply with our feelings and expressing ourselves – will lead to a lot of change in our relationships, both with our partner and into the world. Our communication becomes clearer and honest, we will gain greater respect for ourselves and others, and we will experience a greater sense of personal power, love and joy in our lives.
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