I never understand a lesson in my greatest challenge sooner than years later. That time for me was a dramatic revival that ultimately led to personal growth and continued spiritual exploration.
It started at the beginning of 1978. My life until then was based on my new marriage, my work and my girlfriend. My husband and I met with all the young young couples, some with little children and most without. When I became pregnant in March, it was a true blessing and my life changed into a new and amazing focus. Of course, we intended to have healthy pregnancy with a natural birth and we chose a birthplace in New York City to hand over the baby.
Unfortunately, since I became pregnant, I had morning, afternoon and evening sickness. All types of lantern disturbed me, especially boiled chicken and fish. I had no appetite, since no food appeared to my palate. However, I hated eating a high protein diet (about 80 grams a day), as well as milk problems (in the form of milkshakes and isgos), full of vegetables, fruits and other carbohydrates. This was a recommended daily food requirement for pregnant women and I followed it without question. The health of my unborn child was the only concern and I would do all I can to make sure that it means to suffer from nausea and other discomfort.
I could not wait for the first three months of pregnancy to complete because I believed that my illness would eventually diminish. But after five months I was still sick with vomiting and spasms, as well. My child was usually, thank goodness, but I was feeling worse and worse. The symptoms usually come to me when I expected it at least. I would be shopping at stores and suddenly I went to pain from severe cramps and digestive disorders. These cycles were generally followed by vomiting and abnormal diarrhea.
Sometimes I notice rashes and some bleeding. I received a sonar check to make sure that the fetus was not growing outside the placenta. All clinical data suggest pregnancy. But at the moment I was a mess! I had only won 9 pounds in the first five months and was nausea and vomiting a day. I could not hold anything down.
Finally, on one of my daily visits, my OB / GYN advised me to see a gastroenterologist for testing. The results came as a shock to this, my introduction to the miracle of motherhood. I had Crohn's disease, inflammation of the intestine, which was considered untreated, very bad, painful and prolonged. Although it was not life-threatening, I was five months old with an incurable disease! My fear of the unknown was my greatest enemy and threat. I did not know what to expect or how my lifestyle would be changed.
The doctors assured me that I could lead normal life and keep the disease under the control of drugs. They explained that this illness had nothing to do with a diet, although I told them I've always felt worse after eating. It appeared to be a young adult disease that usually stalled before age 30. At that time, the recommended treatment of sulfur drugs was used to suppress some symptoms and reduce inflammation.
I constantly demand for three days. With fortune destiny I already knew about Crohn's disease because my mother-in-law suffered from it. He had tolerated some actions and had taken numerous drugs to reduce both their inconvenience and prevent subsequent vaccination. Knowing this frightened me, as I was worried that these drugs could harm my unborn baby.
I became so depressed that I could not work. I wallowed in my misfortune and drove me sad for an hour at the end. I felt I had been sentenced to lifetime misery and hopelessness. Fear seemed to rule my life. To his credit, my husband was very understanding and supportive. He tried to encourage me in any way he could. But I only had to deal with the reality of the disease and prepare for the conditions ahead. With a major decision to make, I was used between traditional medicine or maybe another choice. My concern was that the welfare of the innocent child was in me. I spent my days of bereavement wondering if I should fill the prescription for azulphidine – or survive with consequences.
Fortunately for me, I was surrounded by people who were more goals than me. They would make sure that panicking would not be a sensible solution. I had to calm down long enough to check my options and my sister just knew the right advice to give.
She suggested that I read "Three Magic Words" from the United States Anderson, who explained the law of attraction, the term we encounter in our lives, what we emphasize. The book explained that we are the creator of our own reality and that by utilizing this knowledge we can make powerful changes that even create what we yearn for. This was a new and significant announcement for me to contemplate. Could I, in this crisis of my life, receive and change my life?
I desperately began to think of finding answers, as the book suggested. In a calm moment, I learned that somehow, a lesson for me was to learn from this awesome, challenging experience. I continued to ponder daily, train me to see total health, all my body healed. I began to feel better, less like a helpless victim. I began to believe that I was an important part of my own healing process. I felt that I had a major shift in my perception of the situation and I could feel hope and even experienced inner peace. With this renewed motivation, I decided to go one way and see where it took me.
Some friends knew of a wonderful holistic doctor in West Hurley, NY and advised me to look for his opinion. After much examination, his prediction was that with mild movement, good nutrition, daily relaxation and uncertain faith, in seven years I could probably cure my body. This was all I had to hear to make an obligation that I needed to perform a life-threatening crush for personal health. My goal was set.
To reduce digestive dysfunction, my doctor advised me on a strict food regime. It was important to follow a natural or clean diet, he said, which excluded all white flour, sugar and artificial. I made my meals with carefully composed foods, which added the absorption and nutrition of nutrients in my intestine. No longer do I eat meat with potatoes at the same time or have dessert right after I eat. I started eating less protein and more complex carbohydrates with lots of raw fruits and vegetables. Your doctor told me that I had lactose intolerance, which was why my seizure was so serious. I was advised to eat goat's yogurt instead of milk, as it was easier for me to digest and a lot of healthy bacteria necessary for proper digestion.
As soon as I changed my food style and changed the diet, I had nausea, vomiting and cramps. When I was born, four months later, my perfect grandchild, I felt healthy, energetic and alive. My chemist was as surprised as I was. He was skeptical at first and did not believe that diet could really improve my health. But during my pregnancy, he took a significant change in my physical condition and emotional attitude and decided to keep on doing what I was doing.
Meditation and perspective became a major part of my healing process, because they conceal me comfort, strengthening and sense of inner calm. I held my faith through shock and miserable time, because I always knew I was the perfect way to succeed. It was just right!
I could not convince my daughter-in-law to join me in my communication about a healthy lifestyle. He did not want to make sacrifices. Today, Crohn's disease has worsened significantly and has undergone many actions in recent decades.
I continued eating after my son was born and with another child's pregnancy. Seven years later I did not notice certain changes in my body. I started getting some of the weight I had initially missed, which meant that my system would ultimately be eating efficiently.
It has been 28 years and I have not had symptoms of recurrent disease. I consider this sickness a wonderful blessing because it changed my life and spiritual importance. It sent me on a journey into the lofty kingdom of my body, mind and soul. From this crisis, I learned perseverance, faith, love, discipline, and commitment. I learned that confrontation does not mean failure, nor does it mean a defeat. I learned to believe in me and to trust my intuitive sense, as my health was dependent on it. I learned to care for myself with love and to enjoy joy and pride in my achievements. I specifically learned to keep my mind constantly positive and to focus on the outcome with determination and conviction.
I hope other women learn that they also have inner strength from within to overcome adversity and that the pattern can be changed if the desire is strong enough. Of course, it does not guarantee anyone who experiences the health program to recover. But I learned that life is a journey, and while on the move it is best to take control and enjoy the process as positively as possible. That way you attract more of what you want and less of what you fear. It is easy to accept that sometimes a bad role has taken place with a good and meaningful reason.